Tonight I was leaving a party at my friends' house and I knocked a sweet smelling candle off the shelf with my bike helmet and it smashed and splattered across the wall and over the floor of the lobby and the loo. When this kind of thing happens there is no amount of apologising from you or remonstrating insouciance from the hosts that can mask the inevitable: I fucked up, and mucked up their pad, with hot sticky stuff that will be very difficult to get off.

What lesson can we learn from this? Be more careful when leaving friends' homes after a couple of glasses of wine with a bike helmet dangling from your bag whilst spinning round to kiss goodnight to other guests? Check. Don't leave seeet smelling burning candles on shelves by the door that might catch the attention of bike helmets of guests who are leaving and have had a couple of glasses of wine? Check also.  Let it go and cancel continue?  Double check.